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Monday, January 21, 2013

The Groove Tube #55: Downton Abbey's Branson can drive my car anytime

Welcome to The Groove Tube, a weekly recap of the highlights (and lowlights) of some of the scripted TV shows I'm watching (in order of preference):

TV Series of the Week: American Horror Story: Asylum
"Continuum" (Episode 24/January 16, 2013)

Most Disturbing Opening Scene of the Week: It appeared that Kit had killed Grace with an axe.

Most Interesting Family of the Week: Kit, his two wives - Grace and Alma - and their two kids.

Best Underwear Model of the Week: Kit looked mighty fine in his tighty whities and undershirt.

Most Shocking Death of the Week: Alma turned out to be the one who killed poor Grace.

Best New Character of the Week Honorable Mention: I loved Frances Conroy's performance as Jude's tough new roommate.

Best Appearance by a Mad About You Actress: Robin Bartlett, who played Paul Reiser's lesbian sister Debbie on the sitcom, as Dr. Miranda Crump, the asylum's new administrator in 1968.

Best Bitch of the Week: Lana, who is now only interested in fame and having actress Tuesday Weld play her in the film version of her book.

Best Retro TV of the Week: The Flying Nun sitcom on the asylum's TV.

Grade: A

2) Once Upon a Time
"In the Name of the Brother" (Episode 34/January 20, 2013)

Best Flashback of the Week: I liked Dr. Viktor Frankenstein's (aka Dr. Whale) black-and-white flashback.

Most Surprising Kiss of the Week: Cora kissed Mr. Gold/Rumplestiltskin after she agreed to help him find his son in exchange for him allowing her to reconcile with Regina. Apparently these two were once romantically involved.

Best Disguise of the Week: Cora disguised herself as Henry in order to visit Regina in her secret room beneath her father's tomb.

Best Reconciliation of the Week: Cora and Regina after Cora offered to help her daughter get Henry back - they do make a good evil team.

Best Cliffhanger of the Week: Greg Mendell, the injured tourist, called someone and revealed that he has seen something unbelievable in Storybrooke.

Grade: A

3) The New Normal
"Stay-at-Home Dad" (Episode 13/January 15, 2013)

Best Line Honorable Mention: "Mmmm, it tastes like strawberries" - a little girl at Shania's party after finding David's flavored lube in his nightstand.

Best Line Runner-Up: "Did you follow Bebe Neuwirth home from the gas station again?" - Rocky to Bryan

Best Line: “Another Barbra Streisand medley? This is a high school show. It is not believable that a 16-year-old girl played by a 23-year-old actress would be singing songs by a 70-year-old lady” – Rocky to the writers of the TV series, Sing.

Grade: B+ (a funny episode)

4) Nashville
"I'm Sorry for You My Friend" (Episode 10/January 16, 2013)

Best New Character of the Week: 35-year-old David Clayton Rogers as Gunnar's cute brother Jason, who was released from prison after serving 8 years for armed robbery.

Grade: B+

5) Downton Abbey
Episode 20/January 20, 2013

Worst Storyline of the Week: Bates' prison stay is dragging on and on.

Best New Character of the Week Runner-Up: Cute new footman Jimmy Kent (played by 24-year-old Ed Speleers).

Worst Return of the Week: The nasty Mr. Bryant, the grandfather of Ethel's son.

Saddest Scene of the Week: Poor Ethel gave up her young son to his grandparents, who could give him a better life.

Hottest Hunk and Best Return of the Week: Ex-chauffeur Tom Branson (played by 31-year-old Allen Leech), who returned from Ireland with his wife Sybil.

Grade: B

6) Modern Family
"Party Crasher" (Episode 84/January 16, 2013)

Most Bizarre Behavior of the Week: Jay and Gloria stole someone else's cake from a shop for Manny's surprise birthday party. Has anyone actually did this in real life?

Most Surprising Birth of the Week: Usually shows wait until February sweeps for special events like the birth of Jay and Gloria's son.

Grade: B

7) Revenge
"Collusion" (Episode 34/January 20, 2013)

Most Boring Character of the Week: Padma continues to put me to sleep.

Worst Couple of the Week: Nolan and Padma continue to have absolutely zero chemistry.

Best Appearance by a Sunset Beach Actress: Sherri Saum, who played Vanessa on the daytime soap, as business executive Donna Carlisle.

Best Fight of the Week: After learning that the Initiative killed his sister with a drug overdose, an angry Aiden blamed Emily for stopping him from killing Victoria. Let's hope this fight leads to a permanent break-up between these two.

Grade: C+ (since this show has deservedly lost 4 million viewers since September, you do have to wonder if creator Mike Kelley is ever going to right his sinking ship)

8) Deception
"Nothing's Free, Little Girl" (Episode 2/January 14, 2013)

Grade: C+ (this is one slow-moving soap opera, which didn't do much for me this week)

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