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Monday, February 4, 2013

The Groove Tube #57: Naked Boys Singing!

Welcome to The Groove Tube, a weekly recap of the highlights (and lowlights) of some of the scripted TV shows I'm watching (in order of preference):

TV Series of the Week: Dallas
"Battle Lines" (Episode 11/January 28, 2013)
"Venomous Creatures" (Episode 12/January 28, 2013)

Hottest Hunk of the Week Runner-Up: 34-year-old Jesse Metcalfe as Christopher, who cooled off in Southfork's pool.

Best Revelation of the Week Runner-Up: Christopher and Bobby were shocked to learn that Christopher's wife Rebecca is really Cliff Barnes' daughter Pamela Rebecca.

Best Revelation of the Week: Bobby was shocked to learn that Ryland had kidnapped his and Ann's daughter Emma when she was a baby in order to raise her himself.

Villain of the Week: Ann's ex-husband Harris Ryland, who is a nasty piece of work.

Worst Mother and Child Reunion of the Week: Ann's long-lost daughter Emma wanted nothing to do with her.

Best Couple of the Week: John Ross and Rebecca, who became romantically involved.

Best Line: "Love is for pussies" - John Ross

Grade: A (it's so nice to have the Ewings back - and the first two episodes were very entertaining)

2) Glee
"Naked" (Episode 78/January 31, 2013)

Best Fundraising Campaign of the Week: In order to raise $400 for a bus to take New Directions to Regionals, Tina suggested they make a "Men of McKinley" calendar to sell.

Hottest Hunk of the Week: Brody can walk around naked in my house anytime.

Hottest Hunk of the Week Honorable Mentions: A tie between Ryder, Sam and Jake.

Best Return of the Week: Emma Pillsbury, whom we haven't seen since the Thanksgiving episode.

Best Kiss of the Week: Marley and Jake.

Best Dressed of the Week: Santana's purple and blue-striped dress with black boots.

Best Hug of the Week: Blaine and Sam (it's too bad Sam isn't gay because they would make a great couple).

Best Cat of the Week: Brittany's Lord Tubbington!

Best Musical Performance Honorable Mention: "This Is the New Year" by New Directions

Best Musical Performance Runner-Up: Rachel's "Torn" duet with her old self.

Best Musical Performance: Rachel, Santana and Quinn's "Love Song"

Best Line: "What about reports that you look way too old to be in high school?" - a reporter to Hunter Clarington, the captain of the Warblers (played by 26-year-old Nolan Gerard Funk).

Grade: A (give me some groovy music and a few naked guys and I'm happy)

3) Downton Abbey
Episode 22/February 3, 2013

Best Reconciliation of the Week: Robert and Cora

Best Line: "'Lie' is so unmusical a word" - the Dowager Countess

Grade: B+ (I was happy to learn that Bates will FINALLY be released from prison - and his boring storyline)

4) The New Normal
"Dairy Queen" (Episode 15/January 29, 2013)

Weirdest Vest of the Week: In order for a man to nurse his own child, he can wear a vest with fake breasts attached called "The Milkman" (no thanks, I'll use a bottle).

Best Guest Star of the Week: John Stamos as Jane's co-worker/love interest Brice.

Best Line: "It's like living with a magazine I never wanted to read" - Bryan about living with a doctor.

Grade: C (I didn't care much for this episode centered around breastfeeding)

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