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Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Dancing with the Stars: Week 1

I've only watched Dancing with the Stars twice - first in 2008 when Cloris Leachman stole the show and then in 2010 when Florence Henderson, Margaret Cho and Jennifer Grey shook their groove things. But after Bristol Palin was undeservedly voted into the Top 3 by all of her mother's Teapublican fans, I vowed never to watch the show again . . . until now. I've adored Valerie Harper ever since her days as TV's Rhoda Morgenstern, and the 74-year-old actress - who was diagnosed with a rare incurable cancer earlier this year - is truly an inspiration to us all. And it appears that her serious condition has gone into remission as she looked fabulous on last night's Season Opener of Dancing. So I will be tuning in again to watch Valerie as well as Glee's Amber Riley, the cute Corbin Bleu (High School Musical, One Life to Live), and the gorgeous Brant Daugherty (who played a gay character on Days of our Lives and has been a Dish of the Day). Each week I will rank all the stars and their dancing partners in order of preference and predict who will be going home.

So here are my Week 1 standings:

1) Amber Riley & Derek Hough (Score: 27 out of 30 points)
Their cha-cha-cha was great - and it doesn't hurt that her partner is Mr. Hough, who has won the competition four times. I predict that they will be sticking around for awhile. Also, I was happy to see so many of Amber's Glee co-stars in the audience, including Chris Colfer, Kevin McHale, Dianna Agron and Jenna Ushkowitz.

2) Brant Daugherty & Peta Murgatroyd (Score: 22)
Ohhh, that smile of his is lethal to look at. He just melts me into a puddle - and the guy is a pretty good dancer as well. Brant and Peta's cha-cha-cha was very good, and maybe they might have received a higher score if they hadn't been the first ones to perform. Brant revealed that he is single and close to his mother - and my only complaint is that he didn't show any skin (but I'm sure he will eventually).

3) Jack Osbourne & Cheryl Burke (Score: 23)
I liked their foxtrot - and so did his supportive parents Ozzy and Sharon, who were in the audience.

4) Corbin Bleu & Karina Smirnoff (Score: 24)
The evening's contemporary dances were my least favorite to watch, but I predict the athletic Mr. Bleu will do quite well in this competition.

5) Valerie Harper & Tristan MacManus (Score: 21)
Their foxtrot was a bit tentative, but nothing to be ashamed of. And I confess that his Irish accent and handsome face got me all hot and bothered.

6) Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi & Sasha Farber (Score: 23)
The former Jersey Shore star and her cute partner performed a decent cha-cha-cha. And she doesn't appear to be a hot mess anymore.

7) Elizabeth Berkley & Valentin Chmerkovskiy (Score: 24)
The Saved by the Bell/Showgirls star can certainly dance, but her "contemporary" performance was kind of dull.

8) Leah Remini & Tony Dovolani (Score: 21)
The ex-Scientologist King of Queens actress performed a careful foxtrot. She might not be the greatest dancer, but she's funny and likable.

9) Bill Engvall & Emma Slater (Score: 18)
The redneck comedian, who performed a safe foxtrot, was better than I expected him to be.

10) Christina Milian & Mark Ballas (Score: 22)
I'm not familiar with this singer, whose "contemporary" dance featured weird choreography and a whole lot of smoke.

11) Keyshawn Johnson & Sharna Burgess (Score: 17)
The former NFL player said ballroom dancing is effeminate - and I say his cha-cha-cha was pretty lame.

12) Bill Nye & Tyne Stecklein (Score: 14)
I've never heard of Bill Nye the Science Guy before, but apparently his Disney/PBS children's show won 19 Emmy Awards during its 1993-98 run. So he does have a large fan base - even though I was surprised that two young female audience members were rooting for him. And Team "Hot Knowledge" will definitely need their votes since their cha-cha-cha was the worst performance of the evening.

Who Should Be Eliminated Next Week: Bill Nye

Who Will Be Eliminated Next Week: Keyshawn Johnson (my gut instinct says that Mr. Nye probably has more fans than Mr. Johnson and they will keep him safe from elimination)

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